How to cope with a boss that hates you

by Lynn
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How to cope with a boss that hates you

Your relationship with your boss is very important and it really matters in how successful you will be in a particular role and can greatly influence your job experience. So what do you do when you have a boss that hates you? 

The relationship with your boss is very important so it’s very necessary to cultivate a relationship that works despite the feelings. There are many tell-tale signs that your boss hates you and having a boss who dislikes you is no fun and can be mentally draining however, there are several ways to deal with a manager who hates you. 

Ask for their opinion or advise

Make sure you ask for your boss’s advice regularly even if you don’t need it, this will boost their sense of self-importance. And always thank them after they give advice. You should realize that it’s a part of your job to make your boss look good. If you have made a significant contribution to the department, include your boss in the credit, even if he had nothing to do with it. Acknowledging your boss’s support will satisfy their ego and sense of self-importance. 

Compliment your boss 

If you have a hunch that your superior doesn’t like you, you might want to start trying out compliments. You can pretend to be impressed by the self- attributes that they express whether it’s professional achievements, good looks, good sense of style or anything they deem important to them. This might help in improving the relationship, however, do not overdo it. People can always know when someone is sucking up to them. 

RELATED: What to do when you hate your job but can’t quit

Be on time or early 

Do not give your boss more reason to hate you by showing up late. Always show up early, it shows your eagerness to work and it shows how dedicated you are to your job. Also do not show up early and start catching up with your co-workers. Always be the first to show up for meetings, it will show your dedication. Once you start coming in late and you already have a hunch your boss is out to get you they will always notice your tardiness. 

Exude confidence

While it may come as an instinct to automatically keep your head down at work because your manager doesn’t like you. You should in fact do the total opposite, put your head up and exude confidence. Trying to go unnoticed will do you more harm than good. Your efforts will also go unnoticed. 

Change your work ethic  

If your boss hates you, just evaluate your work ethic, your decorum in the office, or your demeanor towards your boss. Your boss may dislike you because you’ve been disrespectful on prior occasions. Try and assess your behavior and work ethic. You may not like your work situation but you have to respect them. Just make your work do the talking for you. Always remember you’re there for the paycheck and experience, Nothing more. 

Don’t avoid your boss 

If you’ve been avoiding your boss, stop. There are much better ways to cope if you hate your boss because chances are your boss knows you’re avoiding them. When you’re at work always remember it’s never personal it’s just business. So if you don’t like your boss, it should not show nor should it affect your work performance. Face your boss head-on, do not show any sign of weakness by avoiding them. 

Let your work speak for you 

Make sure you are a strong contributing member of your team, ensure you’re always involved in the major projects, and your impact is felt within the department and the organization. It’s not enough to just work and meet your deadlines you have to make sure your team sees and recognizes your efforts. This way your boss may not like you but they will start respecting you and they might even start appreciating your input. 

Don’t talk about your boss to your co workers 

This is possibly one of the mistakes most people make. You talk to your coworkers about your boss without knowing who is going to give the report of what you said to your boss. It may seem harmless and sometimes it may be unintentional but it may do more damage than good, It’s unprofessional to say the least. If you do not like your superior there are other ways of coping with it rather than talking to your colleagues. 

Consider your boss’s personality 

It may actually not be you or they may just have some personal issues of their own. Their demeanor may be what makes you think your boss dislikes you. Your boss may have a standoffish personality which may come off as hate. They may also have low self-esteem and they start taking it out on you. You need to evaluate all options before coming to a conclusion.

Find ways to relate with them 

Find common ground in which you can relate that is not work-related. It could be sports, movies, cars, fashion or any hobby they have essentially it should be anything your boss is passionate about. Try and relate to them in any way necessary so your boss can feel connected to you in other ways other than the office and work issues. 

Open up about how you feel 

Communication is vital in every relationship. If you have tried everything you possibly can to salvage your relationship maybe it might be time to face the situation head-on. Figure out a way you can approach your boss if it’s starting to affect your work. Always start gently, try and ask if there are any areas you can improve or if he has a problem with your work performance. You can start with such questions and work your way up to more difficult conversations. 

Give it time 

If you have improved your work ethic, you are overperforming and you have opened up to your boss about your strained relationship, just give it time. Your boss may start warming up to you. Once your boss sees your efforts it might just salvage the relationship.

Resolve your issues

If you’ve tried everything and you have improved your working habits and the evidence of the strained relationship with your boss is evident you should consider talking to your boss’s boss and you can even escalate the same further to human resources. A formal complaint should be the last resort. 

Exit Strategy 

There are bosses who are generally terrible and believe the only way they can manage people is through fear, intimidation, and sometimes even bullying. If this is the case for you it’s better for you to look for other career opportunities and leave because this is not healthy for you especially mentally since you’re at work for a better part of the day. So, start working on an exit strategy and jump ship if you can. Always remember there’s more to life than your job.

Don’t burn any bridges 

When and if you leave your workplace do not burn any bridges, do not give your boss the middle finger, do not cause a scene in the office because it’s a very small world and you never know where you may meet in the future. Take the high road and maintain your cool despite the toxic situation.

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