9 Signs You’re Being Love-Bombed
When a relationship is just starting out everything usually seems so perfect. It can be tricky to distinguish between the honeymoon stage and love bombing. Love bombing is when your partner gives you excessive attention at the beginning of the relationship, they shower you with lavish gifts and give you all sorts of affection. It’s about making you feel obligated and dependent on them. It’s a manipulative tactic to try and control you in the early stages of a relationship.
It can feel almost too perfect to be true and it can feel safe. Because at the end of the day we all want to feel loved, needed, special and worthy in relationships. Case in point The Tinder Swindler manipulated his victims by love-bombing them in order to manipulate them in the long run.
Here are some signs you’re being love-bombed;
Gifts
This is one of the most common signs you’re being love-bombed. They will give you over-the-top extravagant gifts with the intention of making you feel obligated to them. In a healthy relationship, your partner will give you gifts with no intention of making you feel a sense of obligation to them. However, if you’re being love-bombed the intention is to make you feel like you’re indebted to them. At times they may even let you know how much your gifts cost to create that sense of obligation and control on their part.
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Time
If your new partner wants to spend all their time together with you and pay no regard to your schedule. This can be a sign of love bombing. In the initial stages of a relationship it can be normal to want to spend a lot of time with each other. However if you find yourself rearranging your schedule and missing out on important obligations like your job, or spending time with your friends and family. It can be a sign of love bombing.
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Constant Compliments
We all want to be complimented at some point. However if you’re constantly recieving compliments in a short period of time this is a potential red flag. If you’re being love bombed, they give you excess compliments sothey can control your self esteem. This is just another way of trying to manipulate you. They will tell you how their life is complete now that you’re in it and how they just love everything about you. While compliments are great, too many compliments can be overwhelming.
Needy
They can be overly needy in the rlationship. They keep calling and texting you day and night. You may feel obligated to respond to them because of the gifts and compliments they keep giving you. The objective is to make you feel like they’re just a phone call or a text away. If the communication is too one sided this is a sign of lovebombing.
They Become Who You Want Them To Be
A love bomber will become who you want them to be. They become your ideal partner by agreeing with everything you say and telling you what you want to hear. They are not themselves around you. You may notice this because of the inconsistencies in their stories. They are pretentious from the get go. They tell you what you want to hear even when it’s not necessarily true.
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They Commit Fast
A love bomber will commit to you very fast. There are many ways they can commit to you fast. They will start by saying how much they love you very early in the relationship. Real relationships take time to develop. If your partner says I love you after a very short time in the relationship, this is a red flag. Love takes time to develop and even a longer time to actually say it.
They can also show commitment by rushing into things, talks of getting married or moving in together. This happens after a very short time of getting to know them. They will even go to the extent of introducing you to important family members and friends.
The Relationship is Intense
Being love bombed can be great at first but over time it becomes intense. Things move faster than they should which can be overwhelming. If you feel anxious around your partner because you don’t know what to expect it probably is a sign of love bombing. Saying I love you, being introduced to family and friends and talks of marriage in a short time of knowing them can be very overwhelming.
Boundaries
It can be hard to set up any sort of relationship boundaries with love bombers. They get angry and upset when you try to set any sort of boundaries or you suggest you want to move slower in the relationship. They will try and manipulate you into thinking you’re causing relationship problems.
Egg Shells
Another common sign of love bombing is you always feel like you’re walking on eggshells because they tend to overreact. You always feel like you have to be careful around them so as not to upset them. A partner should be someone you can freely open up to and say what you’re feeling. Healthy relationships allow you to express your emotions regardless.
The gifts and the overboard attention is gradually replaced by guilt tripping and gaslighting.