Ways to mend a broken friendship

by Lynn

Friendships fall apart all the time, so how do you mend a broken friendship? Depending on the type of friendship you have, some broken friendships are meant to stay that way. All relationships even friendships have rough patches. If you really care about someone you will look for ways to mend a broken friendship.

All relationships require effort for them to thrive. Here are some ways you can mend a broken friendship;

RELATED: Why we lose friends as we grow older

Evaluate your friendship

Before you try and mend a broken friendship you should first determine if that friendship is worth fighting for. If you’re in a friendship and you keep having issues over the same things despite talking about it, it could be time to let go. Every relationship has limits, including the friendships we cherish so much. If you evaluate your friendship and it’s worth fighting for then you should give it a chance.

Reach out first

If you are not talking to each other, make an effort and be the first to make contact. Depending on why you stopped talking or why you argued, give each other time to cool off. Once you give each other time, be the first one to make contact. This will show that you’re willing to work it out and your intentions to be friends are still there. When making contact don’t go straight into your issues. You can start by finding out how they’re doing and if they’re willing to talk about the issue. When making contact be ready for anything, your friend might not pick up the phone or even respond to your messages. At this point, you might want to give it time before making contact again.

RELATED: 14 Types of friends to avoid

Open up about your feelings

Once you’ve made contact, you should make it clear you want to work things out by talking things out. Most of the time, arguments happen over misunderstandings and miscommunications. One way to mend a broken friendship is to talk about it openly. Talk about your feelings, if they offended you, choose to confront them. The only way you’re going to be friends is if you set healthy boundaries. Your friend will not know what you feel if you don’t talk about it. Be honest about your feelings and this will go a long way.

Blame Game

Drop the blame game. Don’t try and figure out who was wrong or who offended the other person first. Focus on trying to move forward and mending your broken friendship. You don’t want to start the blame game otherwise you might lose your friendship entirely. Accept the situation as is and find a way of getting back on track.

Apologize and forgive

When it comes to making any relationship work, you have to swallow your pride no matter how bitter. It does not matter if it wasn’t your fault or not, apologize to your friend. You can apologize for letting the friendship get to where it is if you were not wrong. This will give your friend the chance to own up to what they did without feeling pressured. If you were actually wrong, then apologize for what you did and own up to it. If your friend apologizes, forgive them. Do not keep score just set healthy boundaries and your friendship will flourish.

Root of the problem

Finding out the root of the problem is very essential if you want to avoid reoccurrence. Diagnose the problem, where did it all go wrong, and figure out a permanent solution. This may not be as straightforward as it seems. The blame game might come up here but try as much as you can to avoid throwing blame. If your friendship survives this stage, then that is a friendship worth fighting for. Don’t ignore the problem and just move on because you just might get back to where you were.

Respect

After talking things out, you will need to rebuild your respect for each other. You can do this by establishing healthy boundaries. This will ensure there’s mutual respect between you and your friend. Keep in mind that some friendships may not go back to what they once were and some may work out perfectly.

Rebuild the friendship

Talk about the things that you would do differently in the future to ensure you have a stronger friendship. You can talk about how you could have handled things and how to prevent a future fall out. This can help rebuild the friendship and it might even be stronger than before.

Take things slowly

Don’t expect to just jump into the bandwagon when it comes to hanging out. It might take some time for you to start hanging out with your friend normally. You can start slow, hang out occasionally, or with regular phone calls. Give it time and things will go back to normal eventually.

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